Anne Hamilton: the event of a thread

On Saturday, John and I went to see the new instalation at the Park Avenue Armory, Anne Hamilton's the event of the thread. I've never been to the Armory, but I think it might be my new favorite building in all of Manhattan. Especially at Christmas time!

The Wade Thompson Drill Hall at the Armory is gigantic and its filled with swings connected to strings connected to a giant white sheet. When you walk in, two people are sitting at a table covered in cages of pigeons. Their quietly reading giant scrolls of paper into an old fashioned microphones. Their voices come out of parcels all over the room that you can pick up and move, which was neat.

The best part of this whole thing obviously is that you get to swing on these giant swings! I even convinced John to ride one with me and then by himself!

If you look up while you're swinging, you can find the wire of your swing that attaches to the sheet and watch it move as you swing!

You can also lay under it and watch it dance above you. It was so much better than I thought it was going to be!

And now, here are a million pictures of me swinging like a child. If you're in the city between now and January 6th, you must, must, must go. Highly recommended!

Merry Christmas to YOU

Wishing you and your family a very Merry Christmas.
xx,
Kate 

PS: Holly loves our tree

Obligatory End of the World Post

In case today is actually the end of the world, I wanted to say farewell to you. If its not the end of the world, I wanted to say AMEN BABY JESUS (you know, because its Christmas time) it is the last day of work before two whole weeks of (paid) vacation. And hot damn I get to leave work at 4:00.

I wanted to share my very favorite Christmas-y picture with all of you, too! From a few weeks ago on my walk to work when they were getting Washington Square Park all gussied up for the holidays!

Also what if the world ends and this is the last picture I ever took? Well wouldn't I be embarrassed?

Happy End of the World to you!

DIY Christmas Tree Garland

Well I'm about to do something I never thought I'd do on this blog. I'm going to give you a crochet pattern. For ADORABLE Christmas garland for your tree! 

You're welcome/I'm sorry, depending on your feelings about crocheting. 

Easy Crochet Christmas Tree Garland
Adapted from here

1. Make a loop of yarn around your crochet hook, leaving a three- or four-inch yarn tail. Crochet three chain stitches
2. Double-crochet (dc) three times into the third chain stitch (the first two chain stitches count as first dc) for a total of 4 dc
3. Chain three, turn work, dc three times into first chain stitch (remaining two chain stitches count as fourth dc). Repeat until garland is desired length

4. Cut yarn, leaving about three inches of yarn tail. Remove the crochet hook from the last loop and slip the tail of yarn into the loop. Pull to tighten

One Year Blogoversary!

Today marks one year that I've been blogging here at Ummm Now What!

What started as a follow up to a Tumblr account ended up being so very much more. I can't thank all of you for reading, commenting and sharing. Its still a crazy to me that people I've never even met read my babbling in this silly space.

And now to commemorate my first year, 12 of my very favorite posts from the past 365 days!
Thank you again for reading!
xx,
Kate 

Reasons to Love New York: Where Christmas Trees Go to Die
Book #3: An Object of Beauty
One of the MOST Offensive Things
365 Years of Engagement
Reasons to Love New York: Last Night I Got Checked for Explosives
Kate and Lenore Take Philadelphia 
A Nick Kristof Follow Up
Flea Food
In Which Street Signs are Important
Surprise Baby: Jonathan Matthew
We Can Do Hard Things
Birthday Chicken and Waffles

How to Impress at Your Office Holiday Party!

Last Friday, my office hosted its annual holiday potluck. Last year I was relatively new in the office, and didn't fully understand the scope of this tradition. I can't even remember what I brought (soda, maybe?) which obviously means that it was lackluster.

This year I knew I had to step it up. Yet on Thursday night, I had zero desire to bake something. So I present to you, an assembled dessert.

"Homemade" trifle requiring zero baking. You don't even have to go near your oven! Here's what you'll need:

Ingredients: 
-Trifle bowl (my Aunt Kathy bought me mine and I found this one for you in case you need one. Its totally necessary for the wow factor)
-Entenmann's pound cake
-Cool Whip
-Pie filling (of any flavor, I used raspberry but cherry, blueberry or apple would work, too)
*Note: you can really do this with any flavors. I've also done brownies and pudding and it comes great.

Here's what you do:

1. Take the pound cake out of the box and cut it into half inch slices

2. Place slices in the bottom of the bowl. You're going to have spaces that aren't filled with cake. Fear not!

3. Open can of pie filling and layer approximately half the can onto the first layer of cake

4. Open Cool Whip and layer on top of pie filling. You're going to have to eyeball it at this point and don't worry if some of the Cool Whip gets pie filling in it. It happens...there are more layers to disguise the error

5. Repeat! After Cool Whip, make another layer of cake, followed by pie filling, followed by more Cool Whip. Make as many layers as will fit in your bowl. I bought three of everything, and ended up with a lot of extras, so I made us a Travel Trifle for our trip with friends to the Catskills

You're going to see trifles on Pinterest that look perfect. No trifle I have ever made looks like that. The layers are messy and a little smudged. But trust me, no one cares. The whole thing went at the potluck and I've already told our Administrative Assistant she'll be getting a cherry one for her birthday in March. Good luck and happy office party season!

Another Reason to Hate the 6 Train

Let's talk about the subway for a minute, OK?

I find the 6 train to be horrendous. I don't ride it often, but when I do all manner of things seem to go awry. For instance, the light up board tells me that an uptown 6 will be there in 3 minutes. But 45 minutes later, I'm still waiting on the platform with 5,000 other subway riders. Or I'm on my way downtown and I somehow get stuck juuustttt past the Hunter College Stop, in the tunnel. Which means you cannot escape. You just sit there in the dark tunnel with your subway neighbors for 25 minutes until you start moving again (this has happened to me a lot...once three times in one week).

Or its last Saturday and you are at the Union Square stop waiting for the 6 to take you to SoHo to babysit (yup friends...babysit) and you see THIS!

I feel like I must have taken the 6 from Union Square before, but I have never seen this TERRIFYING SITUATION. Do you see what that says? It says "Stand Clear of the Moving Platform".

Is it clear to you what part of that platform is going to be moving? Because to me, it was totally unclear. Do I stay away from the edge part that looks like teeth (which is too close to the edge to begin with) or can I not stand where that writing is?

There was a girl standing right near those words and she had on those feather eyelashes and she was on a date with a man in orange pants and brown pointy shoes and I wanted to yell "MA'AM YOU HAVE TO MOVE, YOU MIGHT FALL OVER THE EDGE WHEN THE PLATFORM MOVES AND ORANGE PANTS HERE IS TOTALLY NOT SAVING YOU".

I was literally hyperventilating with Ira Glass of This American Life speaking to me in my ears. I need you to know that I literally waited less than two minutes for the 6 train to get there. In the span of 120 seconds though, millions of terrible platform moving images flew through my head. But then the train arrived and all that happened was that those teethy things moved out about six inches. And they didn't even move to close the gap between platform and train until the train was stopped in the station.

I felt totally duped by the 6 train. It had me terrified for six measly inches. And so, I entered the train, removed my scarf because I was terribly warm from the 2 minutes of terror I had just experiences and proceeded onto SoHo.

One day I will get you 6 train. One day.

Happy Weekend to YOU!